The Weekend After

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This weekend I -

First, worried a bit.

Then,
Started my newest costume project
Found the perfect song with great help
Woke up early on Saturday morning with Javier + coffee in-hand and found myself at a neighborhood flea market which led to run-ins with many old neighbors _ smiles
Bought a really cute hat at a Craft Bazaar
Wore the hat all day Sunday
Spent all of Saturday walking around many neighborhoods
Hugged + cooed with my favorite baby girl
Saw the joys of motherhood up close and personal
Had great conversations with great friends
Ate soy pizza (shouldn't have, but...) mmm - from a small hole in the wall pizza place
Did food shopping and local browsing
Hung out with new friends at a block party even south-er of me
Hula Hooped with the BEST hula hoop at a dance party at our South Philly fountain. I did damn good! And, have asked to have a hoop made for me! It beats my $1 store one.
Enjoyed amazing conversation with another friend for hours after at my house this evening
Learned a new perspective
Ran out the door 5 minutes after she left to spend the evening with my choreographer neighbor
Laughed my heart out at the silliness of It all
Trusted an opinion, truly
Didn't do any laundry
Tended my sweet little garden
Felt loved
Warm
Tired
Joy
Peace
Thanks
Community
and
a little sadness
just to make it all so real.
This is Me
Still a tad worried and nervous
sometimes
just sometimes
a wee lonely
in a really cute
home
over
here.

moles again

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My new dermatologist removed two suspicious moles she didn't like for further investigation. They were sent to a lab for a biopsy.

I am nervous. It is a very weird feeling... and I didn't think I would feel like this.

Please get your moles checked.
Please.

xo,

kat.

fairy tale

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i just reread what i wrote.

maybe this really is

me.

and i am the

only one who doesn't

see it.

but now

i might.

so i bought a

white tutu skirt

at lunch.

because it's fun to twirl in one.

and, because i have a

fairy tale

to tell.

sometimes we do things we are suprised at

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i saw something today.

something of me.

in video form.

of me not being the me

you normally see.

everyday.

silly.

sexy.

funny.

carefree.

and
happy.

but it just doesn't

look like this me.

make sense?

and, i love it.

i like that you don't see the me you see.

you see the other me.

the character.

and i may do it again.

because.

living is loving.

and

freedom to

Be

is unlike anything

i can grasp

in written form.

maybe only

in movment.

color.

performance.

acting

like the other

Me.

xo,k.

kat. hearts ella jo a lot

photo courtesy of her mommy!

i have so much to say about this weekend,
but i just spend the last of it with Little Miss Her
and i am in love.
some folks only make you
smile.
pass it on.
xo.
kat.

Jumping!

image here

Today I was happy when...

E said, girl, you were squished! Ain't no one ever gonna squish you again. I burst out laughing and bounced home. No squishin' me!

When the Brazilian Band played at the end of the University graduation and I got to move my body some, giggle, mellow + sigh.

The warm warm sun on my 8 block afternoon walk and then on my walk home. Dancing to some Lily Allen silliness.

Javier's dog friends + my dog owner friends saying our rounds of hellos and goodbyes.

M saying that my guitar playing and singing is really opening up something inside of him he hasn't found and he is excited we are working some music out.

My one pink clematis bloom opening big and so wide.

The hat tip of the older man who passed me on the sidewalk. Such gentleman like behavior I really appreciated.

The way dark chocolate bar I forgot I bought at Whole Foods! Mmmmmm.

Oh, the soft nose of Javier as she licked the little blond-haired Lily I just met tonight. The little girl fell in love with my baby and they both calmed my soul.

Thursday's life like behavior.

Perfect day.

xo,
kat.

where we land

At North Farm

Somewhere someone is traveling furiously toward you,
At incredible speed, traveling day and night,
Through blizzards and desert heat, across torrents, through
narrow passes.

But will he know where to find you,
Recognize you when he sees you,
Give you the thing he has for you?
...

(And, did I just get on the next train? Sometimes I think I have...)

(original posting idea found here at The Wild and Wily Ways of a Brunette Bombshell)

image above here at vi.sualize.us

dermatologist + moles

I just read something today that had me thinking and fretting and remembering I really should have my moles looked at. I picked up the phone and called my doctor and now have a dermatologist appointment in a week + a half.

I feel better. I have never gone to have them looked at, but I have been saying for years that I should just get it done.

And, I am glad I read what I read today.

I urge you all to do it. I just got a fellow employee to do the same.

Go. I am reminding you, dear readers!

xo,
kat.

Write It Out.

I am home today. And, I was home half of yesterday. I am not sure why exactly it is that I am here, but I needed a break. Sometimes I get like this. A little tongue tied inside my head and I am grateful that when push comes to shove, I just stop.

I was feeling tired + antsy. Maybe even a little lost. Oh, and stressed. I am often concerned about finances. Owning this home on an assistant salary is hard. Yes, my choice. And, I like my job. And, the place I work. And, the perks of it all. I just need to vent for a minute. (Thanks for hearing me out.) It will all work out. It always does...

And, I don't want to sound selfish for sure, but I have so many weddings, showers, baby showers, various parties that I am so grateful and honored to be a part of, but sometimes it's all bittersweet. And, expensive. (I have like 4 or 5 invites on my fridge made so pretty and so tempting!) I love all of my friends + want to be part of all of their big moments, but it's not always in my budget. But, I went out last night for some dear friend-time and I have plans tonight. And, I can't cancel my life smiles. I just have to make choices that work for me. Like, maybe I might have to skip the wedding in July. And, I feel bad saying it out loud, but sometimes I have to say no. Sometimes, maybe, I have to do what I want to do.

Yes, I said it. Bittersweet.

I needed to breathe today in my own sunny yard surrounded by my garden. On my terms. I needed my dog at my side. I needed to slow down, savor my coffee and look around at the amazing things I should be happy about.

Oh, and, I realized as I tossed and turned all night long, that I also had to get my car inspected with a check engine light on. But I felt lucky today when I went to this new shop in walking distance based on a recommendation and explained to the mechanic that I just don't have the funds to make this VW work amazing. I just needed that passing Sticker! I asked him to do the bare minimum so I could pass without spending hundreds of dollars. And, I think he did.

Because after he uncomfortably checked me out with that up + down look he ran to my car looked at some numbers and said, I think I can do it. Apparently, since I drove under 5000 miles this year, I get an emission exemption, meaning > my check engine light can stay on and I can pass with flying colors! How come last year's mechanic didn't tell me that! (I googled this. It's true.)

I just hope when he calls me back, the story hasn't changed. Or my brakes don't have to be replaced. Or something 500 dollar-like is broken.

Because that first discovery may have made this day. This Day.

Oh, and the all male burlesque dinner show this evening might help, too!

See, I already feel much better.

Tootles,
kat.

cousins...

my life through photos.
lately.
while i brew a new story.

gorgeous wedding

on est toujours mieux chez soi

chien et chat

martha stewart bird cage + my bed

maybe I will always be a romantic at heart.
or a daydreamer.
it's where I found myself
dreaming
that truly woke
me up.

Growing up & the Role of Food

order book here
program info here

I was able to listen to author, Mark Kurlansky, discuss his newest book, The Food of a Youngerland at a lecture called - FOOD FOR THOUGHT: THE WPA'S PORTRAIT OF FOOD IN AMERICA BEFORE WWII at the National Constitution Center. I enjoyed the stories + information and can't wait to read the book!

I sat there as folks told their stories during the Q & A and quietly smiled as I remembered Grandma Muscianesi's delish spicy eggplant parm that made me sick everytime I ate it, but I ate it happily and dreamy and loved every morsel & Grandma Florkowski's many-hour long process for the perfect Polish potato pancake that was fried and smothered with cottage cheese and applesauce.

I miss those items as much as I miss them.

I miss the tradition they brought to our table + the community we shared making it together.

xoxo,
kat.

more music

I played guitar tonight with the boys.

again.

It's working.

we have something new going on. And, ironically, it was me who came up with the chord progression and M. with the lyrics...

We think we may take it to an open mic.

or at least ourselves sometime soon.

Typhaney B. Jewelry

Check out Typhaney B. Jewelry.
She makes super cute stuff.
And, she is my friend.

xo,
kat.

magic space

and sometimes, i just want to crawl inside the little nooks + crannies of my magical garden space and see the story unfolding from a much smaller perspective.

today i slowed it down so i could find a secret.

or five.

little surprise

I planted 6 gladiolus bulbs about two weeks ago. I noticed their little sprouts this morning and was super excited.

This is what they may just look like in August sometime. The flower starts from the bottom of the plant and blooms up the stalk. I have never planted bulbs in my yard containers before. I hope they look just like this!


image here

if you feel young.

newfangled

I hang upside down off the couch-edge when the world needs to look rightside up and wonder what do you all do for a newfangled perspective?

Please do tell.

May 9. 2009

Sitting outside today with my laptop. I am writing from my backyard's secret garden. I am listening to Rosie (behind me) sweep her yard. The birds are loud; sweetly tweeting. The rain has stopped and the sun is strong on my arms and the nape of my neck. My little cement yard is blooming and smiling. The dog is squished right next to me panting lightly, tail wagging and loving now. I am so happy today for the joys of home ownership. Tinkering and pruning around my home. It's almost two years. Wow. Life is so good to me. People are good to me. I am surrounded by great neighbors and we all seem to have started this gardening obsession together. It will be so lovely this summer out back. So colorful. I can't wait. But, for today, I will be joyous for what we all have begun. For where my sit bones are seated, for the ability to write and move. Love and let go. Yes and No. Me and You.

And, for gettng unstuck.

I saw the Pennsylvania Ballet perform a production based on the Tango, last night. Oh, so graceful + inspirational. I am obsessed with movement + strength. The way the bodies glided and glowed, close and in sync. I love dance. Color. Costumes. Bodies. Muscles. Music. Air. I shared dinner and drinks with friends until 2 am. We laughed and enjoyed the company. I moved a lot slower this morning and never made it to yoga. I plan on getting me back on my priority list, but at the same time want to understand that the next few months ahead will be tough on my body again so it's okay to go a little softer. In June, I am already signed up for Latin Dance and Yoga twice a week... I am trying to enjoy May and me as I am. I just finished a 4 week project and will be doing it again. And, this time for free. She is giving it to me for free! This One is the One I am not announcing, but it requires movement and character skills. It is a challenge for me to step out of my being and take on a new role. I am enjoying the work and newness it brings to me. I am loving the crafting and inspiration.

I will always be challenging all I encompass. The thing is I don't know anything different. Sometimes I get stuck + sad + lost + confused. Don't we all? But when I get like that, I come out back and look at life changing in front of me from my tender touch and patience. I look at my sweet soul of a dog and how she changed my whole world from day one. And, at how happy she is to be in the moment.

It is things like this I rely on to remind me of Now. Right now. Because sometimes I get stuck like everyone else searching for a softer place to land. And, I have to come back, too.

I think I know where I will go when I need it.

xo,
kat.

Loved

Wildbirds & Peacedrums

this reminds me of what happened last night. the free flow of the moment.

this is beautiful

the other project: be my husband, i'll be your wife

Oh my goodness! I got together with the boys tonight to play music and the evening was WAY beyond successful. I sang my heart out in front of people like I never did before. We danced, sang, jumped around for hours. We sweated our cuteselves off!

I shared some songs I wrote; they were a hit and we went with them and kept going for hours. I can't seem to explain it?

I wish I could write something more coherent now, but I am so stoked + so happy.

The world has been pushing me for so long for this moment. I have been aching inside to let out so many things... I guess they were waiting for the year of 32 for Kat. to take the stage in more than one way.

Tonight we started singing "be my husband, I'll be your wife" out of the clear blue and I was the only gal out of 4 men. I just went with if for over an hour. We got so silly. And loose, until we found our groove. And, I did some dance routines with a tambourine all over the room.

I found peace.
I have not been this happy is so long.
I like my days right now.
I am only beginning.
I will say it here > I am proud of me.

project

Wow.

That was living.

Every nervous jolt + all its anticipation worked itself out exactly the way it needed to be.

Funny.

I laughed. I giggled. I might have winked.

I definitely twirled.

I almost fell.

I might be onto something.

I recommend you try something you fear.
To conquer one is to conquer all.

xo,
kat.

etsy !

Three of the necklaces have been listed! The other three coming soon...

listing right here!

Hula Hoop

I bought a hula hoop at The Dollar Store.

I can't do it well, yet. There has to be a trick? I have the hips.

Just wait.

SALE SALE SALE SALE SALE SALE

All earrings on my etsy site are WAY marked down.

Stock UP!

It's a bargain... $8.00 to $16.00

The necklaces will be added this evening at a very fair price! =)

xo,
kat.

It wouldn't let me shut down!

So, I tried to "break-down" the jewelry studio in my home on Saturday + something crazy happened, it would not let me! I laid down on the couch in the room and when I got up, all of this happened. Bizarre. The thing is I don't ususally make necklaces. I am an earring designer. I thought?

I am excited. I think they are cute. I used a lot of vintage items, real money (pennies!), pretty lace fabrics or scarves, beads and a needle + thread.

I plan to post these onto my etsy site very soon. And, believe me, there will be plenty more. I have a box of old vintage pins and such to further complicate these charmers.

I am wearing one of them today and it's fabulous!

xo,
kat.

back in the saddle

Sometimes the only way to get back in it is to sit with It for a little while.

So I am.

happy anniversary dear blog!

image here!

I just realized my blog has celebrated it's first year of life this week.

And, I am celebrating my new life that came with it.

Happy 1st year Soul Space!

cheers!
kat.